This is mainly because I've been the same person for a long time, which is ironically a change for me. but by being the exact same, I feel empty. I feel defeated. I feel boring. I feel like I've run the race but instead of finishing, or even getting close to finishing, I've instead ran ahead of everyone and they've taken a shortcut around me, thus gaining miles while I'm still waiting.
Another change is that I've all but given up on love. I still long for it, but I don't think it will ever come. It's like the more I hope for it, the more it hides and plays games. I don't trust that it will find me for awhile.
But at the end of the day, in the bottom of my heart I still "want kisses on my back. I want kisses on my cheeks. I want to wrap my legs around you. I want to sit on your lap and barely kiss you. I want to ditch boring things and make out instead. I want to lay in bed all day, just you and I, just sheets and us I want to fall in love, just once, just you, forever and ever"
(^^^yay for cliche love quotes!)