Life in my world consists of music, family, friends, fun, school, me. (not in that order all the time). But I cannot be summed up in one paragraph. One story. One book. I won't tell you about all of me. I probably don't trust you. I don't trust alot of people. I trust probably 3 or 4 people. Sure alot of people think that they know about me. That they know exactly what I'm talking about when I say all of me. But you don't. Because not even the people I trust know all of me. My life is complex and always changing. I sometimes don't know me. I know what I believe, what I think, what I want or need. But is that me? Or is there more to me? Do you know? No. Because I probably don't trust you enough to tell you what i think feel believe want or need. I'm a very untrusting person. Especially right now. Nothing special has happened for me to think that. I just want to party and forget about it ALL though. I want to leave everything behind me. But can I? No. Because it's shaped me so it will always be with me. Is that fair? No. Because it's like doing all the work and not getting the paycheck. I've moved on and tried to be a better person, but do I get to leave it behind which is all I want? No. Because life is unfair. So my advice to you. Don't expect. Don't hope. Don't want. Don't love. Don't hate. Because it will all change. And all you will have is a memory of the time you wasted over the impossible. Will you feel better? No. Will you ever? No.
Written by Courtney Eberhard